About

Heretic TOC is my personal blog. I have been at odds with “the dominant narrative” of sexual morality over the last several decades, especially as regards children’s sexual self-determination and paedophilia. My aim here is to present a discourse of resistance. That probably sounds grim, but humour and cheerfulness are my weapons of choice, along with reason and research. Odd to call cheerfulness a “weapon”, I suppose, but I do feel it’s a good tool, at least, for combating the depression into which so many are prone to sink in these difficult times. Nor do I really intend to use humour as a weapon to hurt people, in the sense that satire can be savage. I prefer a gentler tone, in line with the kind of society I’d like to see.

I wish I could say it’s optimism keeps me going, but the demented ferocity of “abuse” witch hunting is patently becoming ever more dangerous and destructive. Raging infernos burn themselves out eventually, but I doubt I shall live to see the day. Anyone who wants to know about me need only Google. Here I will just add that I am the author of Paedophilia: The Radical Case, the full text of which is accessible at IPCE , and (as Carl Toms)  Michael Jackson’s Dangerous Liaisons. – Tom O’Carroll

COMMENTS

Comments on the posts are very welcome provided they comply with the laws of the United Kingdom, where this blog is hosted, and any country from which they are sent. Comments may be edited, cut, or rejected. Please aim for the 4 Cs: Concise (maximum 200 words, preferably less), Courteous, Coherent and Content-rich i.e. opinion is fine, but better if supported with interesting information or links. No visual links though, please.

GUEST BLOGS

Guest blogs of up to 1000 words, but ideally 700-800, are invited. Email me initially (tomocarr66@yahoo.co.uk) with just a brief description of the intended topic. If you have already written a piece I will consider it, but items “tailor-made” after some prior discussion with me are more likely to be accepted.

110 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. thoughtsofadeviantdissident
    Dec 26, 2016 @ 21:46:20

    Do you think militant paedophilia may come to the forefront because of the witch hunt that’s being perpetuated by the tabloid media, the BBC and tattooed knuckle dragging thugs aka paedo hunters?

    Reply

    • tomocarroll
      Dec 26, 2016 @ 22:47:15

      Depends what you mean by militant. There is no mileage in violent extremism, though, if that’s what you mean. Whoever tries it is dead, with nothing whatever gained.

      Reply

      • thoughtsofadeviantdissident
        Dec 27, 2016 @ 22:01:27

        I wouldn’t advocate violence of any description. What I meant was non violent civil disobedience. Militant in the form of fighting back against the witch hunts, etc. More like Stonewall was for gay rights…

        Reply

        • tomocarroll
          Dec 27, 2016 @ 22:36:21

          I wish there was a way. Tell me if you find one.

          The Stonewall Inn was a gay venue, where the gay community already had strength in numbers, locally at least, so their revolt against a police raid had a chance of being effective.

          However, I think organised protest by paedophiles based on events with similar numbers, or even an event with thousands attending, would be put down with ruthless force, with strong public support. Stonewall would not have worked for the gays if public hostility had been as great as it is against paedophiles.

          There are other way, for sure, such as the spectaculars organised by the likes of Fathers 4 Justice some years ago in the UK. They threw purple flour at the Prime Minister, and had a Batman figure landing on Buckingham Palace.

          I suspect such antics would merely get paedophiles jailed to no great effect.

          Reply

          • thoughtsofadeviantdissident
            Dec 30, 2016 @ 16:53:39

            I think there are only 4 choices for the future of our sexual orientation. One is the status quo were people are criminalised. Two is rounding us all up and putting us to death, as some would advocate. Thirdly, throw us all in jail for a long time, requiring possibly space for several hundreds of thousands of us. The last option and the leas likely in my lifetime is the decriminalisation of active paedophilia and watching child port. [TOC: Sport? Ah, porn, got it! For one dreadful moment I thought they’d made it illegal to watch kids playing soccer, etc., although that may come!]

            I strongly believe that we are headed towards some resembling 1930’s Nazi Germany’s attitude towards some minorities and the persecution that followed, but with paedophiles being the target, legitimised by the State, media and the large thuggish element prevalent today!

            Reply

  2. tom smith
    Nov 26, 2016 @ 21:37:33

    Wonderful blog here/ thank you so much!

    Reply

  3. Jessie Nagy
    Nov 24, 2016 @ 06:43:15

    Article submission:
    Origins Of B.D.S.M./Hypocrisy Of Female Sexuality | by Jessie Nagy

    [ARTICLE DELETED; MODERATOR COMMENT FOLLOWS]

    Dear Jessie Nagy,

    Thank you for submitting your article, “Origins Of B.D.S.M./Hypocrisy Of Female Sexuality”.

    Unfortunately, there are a number of reasons why I will not be able to use it, starting with length: at nearly 7,000 words it is far too long for use as a guest blog, as I aim to keep these at around 2,000 words or under. Sometimes a blog can be split into more than one part but only if the style is right, and I am afraid that is not the case with this one: it is written like notes for an essay rather than an essay itself, which needs a more flowing and connected narrative.

    Judging by the subject matter as it presents itself in the first few paragraphs, your theme and ideas might be of some be interest but the material needs to be marshalled very carefully into a coherently presented argument and I do not see any sign of that.

    So I cannot use your article. You are welcome to make short comments on my blog in the usual way though.

    Best wishes,

    Tom O’Carroll
    Heretic TOC

    [P.S. THE ABOVE MESSAGE WAS SENT TODAY TO THE EMAIL ADDRESS YOU GAVE, BUT A RETURN SERVER MESSAGE WAS RECEIVED SAYING IT COULD NOT BE DELIVERED.]

    Reply

  4. Christian
    Nov 22, 2016 @ 13:36:26

    Rejoice! Web.horde.ws has rated the “Child Safety” of your blog as “Excellent”:
    http://web.horde.ws/tomocarroll.wordpress.com
    So all mothers can confidently let their kids visit H-TOC.

    Reply

    • tomocarroll
      Nov 22, 2016 @ 13:56:24

      >Web.horde.ws has rated the “Child Safety” of your blog as “Excellent”

      Quite right, too, albeit a surprising accolade!
      Thanks for info, Christian.

      Reply

  5. Tim Miles
    Nov 13, 2016 @ 06:40:13

    The Sun readers of the Country who are controlled by a easy no weight view. Will always gather strength in numbers it easy to blame. When you look at other Countries through out the world we are the most backwould in my mind on this subject. History proves your points it easy to say no.

    Reply

  6. tim miles
    Nov 12, 2016 @ 20:07:19

    Hi Tom, freedom of speech in this country is slowly slipping away.
    My thoughts support a lot in which you speak, I can’t say to much but
    keep on being true to yourself. It’s gone totally mad the country in which we live in over protective to the extreme .

    Reply

  7. sbobet
    Oct 28, 2016 @ 19:16:25

    Appreciating the time and effort you put into your
    site and detailed information you provide. It’s nice to come across a blog every once in a while that isn’t the same out of date rehashed information. Fantastic read!

    I’ve saved your site and I’m adding your RSS feeds to my Google account.

    Reply

  8. Cori Rodriguez
    Apr 29, 2016 @ 00:29:44

    Your an idiot and so are the people who espouse your claptrap. You can keep fighting but you will never win. Your wish to have sex with children just shows what a lunatic you are along with all your perverted friends and followers. What’s the matter, can’t find anyone your own age who would tolerate you or were you just rejected a lot as a teenager?

    Reply

    • tomocarroll
      Apr 29, 2016 @ 09:34:17

      >What’s the matter, can’t find anyone your own age who would tolerate you or were you just rejected a lot as a teenager?

      On the contrary, Cori, I was not bad looking (check out the old newspaper photos online if you don’t believe me), well educated, had a good job, and young ladies were falling over themselves to be my girlfriend. Unfortunately for them (and possibly for me!), I just didn’t find adult women sexually attractive, and still don’t. That’s what paedophilia is: it’s about being attracted to children. It is an orientation, just like being gay. It’s not something you choose. It’s who you are.

      Reply

      • M.
        May 10, 2016 @ 20:22:51

        9 months since my last post and I am still alive and kicking. Well, well….it appears as “James Riske”, “Bob and Carole” and racist “Tom Shelly, White God” is still alive and well, or at least that sort of mentality. I remember back in the mid 1990’s (yeah, I’m THAT old!) when you, Tom, had some spirited debates/fights with that boorish cretin on the usenet forums. His vile attitude and closed mind used to anger me beyond words. I applaud your calm, well thought out response to “Cori Rodriguez”. I don’t think there’s enough narcotic sedatives in the world for me to be able to deal with those types of arrogant blowhards. I doff my cap to you, good sir!

        Reply

        • tomocarroll
          May 10, 2016 @ 22:54:53

          Thanks very much, M. Very best wishes to you! It seems my memory must going, though, because I do not recollect the debates/fights you mention in the 1990s on the usenet forums. Sure it wasn’t another Tom? Tom Reeves, perhaps?

          Reply

          • M.
            May 11, 2016 @ 23:09:44

            Hmm…whoever it was used the pseudonym Tom O’Carrol. It was for that very
            reason I happened to remember your name! It must have been an admirer of
            yours. You’ll be happy to know whoever it was did a fine job defending our
            position and cause. Thanks for your reply, hope you are doing great! 🙂

            Reply

            • tomocarroll
              May 12, 2016 @ 08:49:08

              >…hope you are doing great!

              Sure am thanks! All best!

              Reply

  9. Explorer
    Mar 14, 2016 @ 13:01:34

    “No visual links though, please.”

    Tom, can I post a link to the YouTube video featuring France 24 English report about homophobia (and paedophobia) in Russia? There is nothing even remotely resembling “kiddie porn” there, so it can be used against you, me and everyone else here, for sure…

    Reply

    • tomocarroll
      Mar 14, 2016 @ 13:22:19

      OK, go ahead.

      Videos are a problem, though, especially if they go above two or three minutes. I may not have time to personally check them. Despite that I remain legally responsible.

      Reply

      • Explorer
        Mar 14, 2016 @ 14:21:55

        Thanks. And I wanted to say “it can NOT be used against you, me and everyone else here, for sure”. Unfortunately, there is no way to edit your comment after you have posted it… And making replies is hard, since you are automatically moved in the end of the web page, losing the ability to see text to which you are replying. And the comments are shrinking when you are replying…

        WordPress as a blog platform has its technical problems, for sure. But it supports unrestricted free speech, and this is what is good about it. It refused to supress your blog after the public demands to do it, as I remember…

        Reply

  10. fasfkasf
    Feb 22, 2016 @ 16:44:35

    Hey, Tom. Mind ever joining us in LifeLine (run by BoyChat) to real-time chat with other paedophiles? There is quite a mixed audience, in fact — several non-paedophiles, several female paedophiles, both heterosexuailty and homosexuality represented.

    Reply

    • tomocarroll
      Feb 22, 2016 @ 17:04:34

      >Mind ever joining us in LifeLine

      Sure, sounds interesting. Not this week, though. Kinda busy. Thanks for asking.

      Reply

      • fasfkasf
        Feb 27, 2016 @ 14:29:26

        So you’re coming sometime? Cool. May want to tell me the day(s) and time(s) and then it could be announced on both BC and LL that a ‘special guest’ is coming – many people would be interested in talking with you, I imagine, being such an important figure. Also, the chatroom is only open at scheduled times – typically Tuesdays 6PM-10PM, Thursdays 4AM-6AM, Fridays 6PM-8PM, Saturdays 8PM-10PM, and Sundays 6PM-10PM, all times British time. But there are exceptions, because rarely a scheduled time gets missed and the chat doesn’t go open, and sometimes the chatroom is open at random times. All of that can be accounted for, however, by planning it with one of the moderators – I could arrange that for you if you want.

        Reply

        • tomocarroll
          Feb 27, 2016 @ 17:40:24

          >May want to tell me the day(s) and time(s)

          OK, thanks for the schedule. I’ll give it some thought.

          Reply

  11. Andrew Wyatt
    Feb 16, 2016 @ 03:45:05

    Hi Tom,
    I see Esther Faker has started a petition against you being in the Labour Party.

    https://www.change.org/p/jeremy-corbyn-mp-remove-paedophile-advocate-tom-o-carroll-from-the-labour-party/c

    Reply

  12. Boy
    Feb 16, 2016 @ 02:36:54

    Tom, I’m not a paedophile and I just want to thank you for all the work you’ve done over all these years, despite the situation monumentally becoming worse and worse to the point in which two teenagers having sex is now grounds for prison and destruction of lives. You have been fighting for the rights and dignity of human beings, you KNOW this. You may have opinions overwhelmingly against you, but facts will remain facts and what you are doing is still undoubtedly right and benefits all of us, even those of us who are not paedophiles. Though unfortunately the situation is very bad right now, it will change as long as someone keeps swimming against the tides and one day we will usher into a new era of understanding and tolerance.

    Despite not being a paedophie I know very well the extent of damage the sex panic has inflicted on my friends, my loved ones, the personalities of various people in general and their quality of life. And we just had to experience a tiny fraction of the damage that could be inflicted in only a relatively non-severe case, but then the possible massive extent of the damage, and the subtle indirect damage to everyone in general became felt. Fighting against this sex panic isn’t a matter of being a paedophile or not but working towards the common good of everyone. My loved ones and my friends are aware of the damage our lives had to endure and we support your struggle. We are an innocent family which has been damaged by the social attitudes supposedly meant to protect us but which have really ravaged our lives.

    Fight the good fight!

    Reply

    • tomocarroll
      Feb 17, 2016 @ 01:32:14

      Many thanks, Boy! SORRY for delay in moderation. Problems with media plus I am on the move and not good at using tablet keyboard.

      Reply

  13. Así son los “pedófilos virtuosos” | Dashground
    Jan 25, 2016 @ 04:33:58

  14. Captain burrito
    Jan 06, 2016 @ 08:54:15

    I’m not a pedophile, but sorry you ppl take so much shit.

    Reply

    • tomocarroll
      Jan 06, 2016 @ 09:52:38

      Thanks, cap’n, for saying that. It is a fair-minded observation, and we see too few of those. This definitely reflects the aggressive dominance of the loudest voices; the quieter majority are not necessarily so unreasonably harsh.

      Reply

  15. Paula Black
    Dec 30, 2015 @ 22:57:33

    Tom, why aren’t you letting my comments be posted? I guess you would prefer to stay blissfully stupid and ignorant, so you and your child raping friends can keep thinking that you aren’t hurting kids. You actually love them and wouldn’t cause any harm to any child other than sticking your dick in them! That causes harm. I wouldn’t have gotten so mean and rude if you would have let the first comment go on, but no. Now, I’m going to harrass the shit out of you. Also, where this SHIT is posting in America. That makes it illegal. So, I’ll just contact the authorities!

    Reply

    • tomocarroll
      Dec 30, 2015 @ 23:06:27

      LOL, I did just post your long rant, because it was at least fairly polite, before seeing this latest one accusing me of bocking your posts. One of your four posts, all appearing within a few minutes of each other, definitely crossed the line though so I trashed it. Inviting people here to commit suicide, as you did, is definitely a no, no. So are your baseless threats: there is nothing illegal about this site in the land of the First Amendment.

      Reply

  16. cas
    Oct 16, 2015 @ 03:08:54

    I’m a young man. I just graduated from high school this year. I don’t know what to do with my life, I’m very poor, and being a boylover in the middle of all this makes everything so hard. I’m sick and have no health insurance… my life’s just a mess, and I have no hope. I came out as a pedo to all my online friends because I have nothing to lose anymore. I might come out as a pedo more, too. IDK… I’m a BL and I hate my life.

    Reply

    • tomocarroll
      Oct 16, 2015 @ 15:19:19

      Not a great time to come out locally, Cas. You think you might get sympathy that way? Don’t count on it. You could make a bad situation a whole lot worse.

      Give yourself something to work with here. When everything looks terrible in every direction, it helps to focus on a positive possibility, no matter how small and insignificant it might seem. You need just to put your BL feelings in a “too hard for now” box and focus on the stuff you might be able to deal with, starting with getting well and then seeing how you can make a living, as it sounds as though you haven’t had your first job yet.

      So you’re just out of high school, you’re sick and your parents can’t help with health costs? Or any other friends or relatives?

      By all means write in more detail about your situation. Then I can chip in with some ideas based on facts rather than speculation, and maybe other folks here can help too.

      I find that just writing about things can be helpful in itself. It clarifies our thoughts and enables us to deal with problems one at a time as we think about a sensible ordering of priorities. If we don’t do that, then everything just stays one big mess in our head and we give up.

      I already know you can take a positive step, actually. Your email proves it. Instead of just despairing you wrote to this blog and thought maybe it would help. And it will. Or it will if you keep your mind open to that possibility and write again more fully.

      And here’s a thought to hang onto in the meantime.

      Most of us here are BLs and GLs. Many of us have had big, big problems as well as our sexuality, such as being without a job, losing friends, going to prison.

      But, hey, we’re getting by OK now. At this blog you’ll find a lot of us are pretty darned cheerful and enjoying life. I am a BL too. I’ve had my troubles, and times of despair when I was a young man. But I’m 70 now, and thriving. It is possible for us to be happy at 30, 40, 50 too.

      So hang in there, Cas, and let’s be hearing from you again soon.

      Best wishes!

      Tom

      Reply

  17. tank
    Sep 14, 2015 @ 22:43:14

    Hi tom. I’m new to this complicated twitter internet stuff!
    It took me ages to find this and I just identify with so much that is being said here. It’s such a relief, 1.to download your book and 2.be able to see things discussed rationally and sympathetically. I now live alone and have a fairly anonymous life. My interest in, delight in and fondness for young girls is regarded as so horrendous and evil that I now hate myself and desperately try to repress my feelings and behave in a way acceptable to society.
    I am aghast that people think I would deliberately or accidentally hurt a child physically emotionally or psychologically.
    Thank God for your book!
    I would be interested to know about other people in a similar situation and how they cope. Just to have a conversation that is friendly, non-judgemental, rational and not too ‘heavy’.
    Are we allowed to have a sense of humour?

    Reply

    • tomocarroll
      Sep 14, 2015 @ 23:06:51

      >Are we allowed to have a sense of humour?

      Absolutely! Good to hear from you, Tank. Stay tuned!

      Reply

    • Paula Black
      Dec 30, 2015 @ 22:34:01

      As a victim of child molestation, I can assure you that it does severe damage to the child and to say otherwise, is just your way of trying to justify what you enjoy. Hell, I like to hunt, so should I hunt humans due to the fact that killing animals is so fun. I think not, and no matter how I would try to justify my love of murder, it’s still murder. Plain and simple. It doesn’t matter how much I like it or not, it’s still wrong. You say we are born with the desire to have sex with children, but are we not born with the same need to murder. Are we not mammals? And, how is this any different? I am not being rude or inconsiderate, I just have a knack for calling out false logic. I didn’t come here to argue, I would only like to hear your outlook on my reply. I can completely understand if I don’t hear back from you, due to the fact that my logic is sound and yours isn’t logic at all, it’s just desire and trying to find a way to explain away the fact that you have harmed and hindered so many. Not, only are you hurting yourself, the children that you have molested, but all of these poor people who come here looking for reasons to keep their desires on going. You do realize that most of these people will feel comfort for the first time by belonging. Thus, these people will finally feel comfortable enough to act out their desires and end of in prison or even worse, dead! This is a disease of the mind, these people need to be pittied and helped. Not, told that all of this is right as rain?!? It is illegal and they will end up imprisoned or killed and neither is okay with me! Do we imprison or murder the mentally disabled or mentally insane, no! We provide them with the help that they so desperately need. I have read some of the comments and these people seem to be more depressed, flawed and mentally ill, rather than the latter of criminals or deviants. Help these people, sir. Help them travel down the road that you refused to travel. The road that’s less taken will lead to a good, happy and productive life. The road that your telling them to travel is filled with pain, uncertainty, regret, and loneliness. Especially once they’re locked up and they have to register as a sex offender. I couldn’t imagine being told that I have to alert everyone that lives around me to the fact that I couldn’t control myself and I enjoy having sexual relations with children! I can imagine my neighbors torturing me over the fact. I can imagine getting attacked every, other day and the police not caring because no one likes child molesters. If you had a child would you not feel the same way? But, to mistreat and harm these people isn’t what I’m looking for. I’m looking to help them and in helping them, I help all of the children that won’t be molested and treated as a sex toy, like I unfortunately was. Just think, if someone cared that much for my molester, I wouldn’t need the therapy that I pay so much for. I wouldn’t need to fear for my children like I do. I would be able to let them live a more free range life, but I can’t. I can’t do that because I am so afraid that a lost soul will find them and treat them the way I was treated. This hasn’t affected only myself, but everyone in my family. It’s affected my children because I shelter them more than I should. It affected my mother so badly that she eventually died from the matter because she was the one who let my molester stay with us and the whole time she was downstairs, I was being raped upstairs. This affected my father because he watched his little girl become a woman overnight. Once you open that door, you can’t close it. This has affected my husband because he’s had to watch his wife be raped over and over again every night when i go to sleep. Also, I’m such a shut in, due to the fact that if someone (who we trusted and loved) could do this to a 5 year old child can you imagine what else the world has in store for that child. My health has felt the affects as well. My cervix is completely upside down and backwards and severe bladder problems. It was only by God’s grace that i was able to have children. The doctor said it was impossible for a long time. Also, I had cervical cancer at the ripe age of 12 years old and the doctor said that this was a direct result of being “sexually active” at a very young age. I guess you can call it “sexually active”. Just please, step back and look at what your actions cause for the child in question and quit being so selfish. Actually help these people and quit telling everyone that abusing a child is okay, because it’s not! It’s really not okay for the child who has to live with what happened for the rest of their life and all of the medical issues that come with it. Good luck, best wishes and God bless to everyone.

      Reply

      • tomocarroll
        Dec 30, 2015 @ 22:57:32

        No one here defends rape. I thank you for the temperate expression of your comments, but they are misplaced.

        You are welcome to make specific criticisms of anything you see written here but keep it brief please. There is no point in lengthy tirades that completely fail to either notice or address what this blog is about.

        Reply

        • Tash
          Feb 17, 2016 @ 04:07:45

          It’s scientific fact that sex with children causes a multitude of medical problems. Aside from that, a child is not old enough to have developed an educated understanding of their fragile bodies and the relationships that develop between two people so any involvement with an adult in early years can and DOES result psychological damage and pain once the child is old enough to start considering the events as a developed adult. There’s an insurmountable body of personal accounts that support that stance so I find it hard to believe, though you seem to speak thoughtfully and with conviction, that you could possibly truly believe that you are not causing harm when you do these things.
          You are. There’s proof. Accept that and come to terms with who you really are and what you have done.
          I think a lot of pedos (definitely not all) need help more than anything but you cannot be serious about thinking thus is okay?? Maybe for you it is! But not your victims.
          The very fact that many of you describe your attraction specifically to the age group just shows how temporary your “love” is and how you’re really just objectifying people who are too young and defenceless to know better and protect themselves. You don’t love them. You’re just using them. And when they grow up they’ll realise that and THAT’S when the damage really hits.
          You’re just in denial.

          Reply

  18. M.
    Aug 08, 2015 @ 20:05:26

    Hi Tom,
    This is M. checking in to let you know I am alive and doing ok. Still horribly lonely, but suicide is not an option at the moment. I appreciate the support and kind words shown by those that can truly relate to my situation, as mine is a struggle we all seem to face at one time or another. Summer won’t last much longer here in North America. I tend to spend most of my days indoors, away from the tiny feminie visions of lovelliness, scantily clad in swimwear or shorts. It causes tremendous longing, both emotional and physical. Like the Stones said in Paint it Black, “I see the girls walk by dressed in their summer clothes, I have to turn my head until my darkness goes”. Here’s hoping your visions of loveliness don’t cause you any grief or longing like mine do. On a lighter note, I would like to wish you a sincerely happy 70th birthday!! Hope you are out and about with friends or someone special relishing the day/evening, and soaking up the sights we all delight in. May g_d, or whatever greater power that runs things in our world give you 70 more years with a hundred times less trouble and ten-thousand times more joy than the last 70. Thanks again for all you’ve done for our plight! ENJOY! 🙂

    Reply

    • tomocarroll
      Aug 08, 2015 @ 22:54:40

      Glad to hear you are doing okay. Thanks for birthday greetings. Yes, l am in good company!

      Reply

    • Ronnie
      Aug 11, 2015 @ 13:50:01

      Hi M. After reading your post here, let me just hold out my hand in solidarity to you. Loneliness is a slow death, but you aren’t alone in spirit. Hang in there.
      Love and peace.

      Reply

    • tank
      Sep 14, 2015 @ 22:50:36

      M. I have SO much sympathy with what you say….. and feel. I identify with everything you say. Keep sane, enjoy life. Girls are even more attractive in summer!
      Wish i’d found these sane comments earlier in my life.

      Reply

  19. Ronnie
    Aug 04, 2015 @ 12:50:28

    Hello Tom,

    I just saw part of the “60 Minutes” show on Australian TV on YouTube, where you and the moderator were banging heads. His moderation was outlandish if not downright unprofessional. It’s a wonder you got out one complete sentence for his continual interruptions. I think I would have walk off too.

    Is there any mainstream media anywhere nowadays that would at least provide an equal discourse on pedophilia?

    When Barbara Walters was interviewing Mary Kay Letourneau, she at least allowed Mary to present her arguments uninterrupted—although if I was being interviewed, I would ask Barbara to take the lemon wedge out of her mouth.

    Reply

    • tomocarroll
      Aug 04, 2015 @ 23:16:04

      >Is there any mainstream media anywhere nowadays that would at least provide an equal discourse on pedophilia?

      In my experience, Ronnie, no. I had an offer from BBC TV earlier this year. I think the programme presenter who made the offer was quite genuine, but he was overruled by the top brass and the plans were dropped.

      Reply

  20. Ronnie
    Jul 23, 2015 @ 12:59:41

    Hi Tom. Long time no comment. I thought I’d upchuck one now. Concerning legal child modeling sites that are vanishing under our very noses. Apart from all the viruses and malware out there guarding child porn, there is increasing pressure from law enforcement to shut down those modeling sites whose legal status have been revoked.

    I just came off a legal-comment site pertaining to this subject. The site itself was not particularly decisive. But its forum was. Allow me to present this upchuck: “Them sites ain’t right! Anybody who makes one needs a good Texas hangin’! We don’t like them there pedophiles in Texas!”

    Get the Pepto-Bismol out.

    Reply

  21. phil stevens
    Jul 22, 2015 @ 17:32:21

    ‘Don’t let your own “yuck” factor get in the way of understanding that not everyone is the same.’
    That encapsulates a great deal of response to almost any sexual debate, particularly the more moderate elements of opposition (as I’ve said elsewhere, a lot of the more vitriolic expression is just bullying-with-expedience).

    Reply

  22. Sarah
    Jul 22, 2015 @ 12:05:23

    Did you read Catcher in the Rye? A child is not a pet

    Reply

    • tomocarroll
      Jul 22, 2015 @ 13:18:14

      >Did you read Catcher in the Rye?

      Yes, I did, but you’re testing my memory here, as it was over 45 years ago, when I was still a teenager myself. As I recall, young Holden Caulfield, who is about 15, objects to some guy coming on to him, saying “I don’t want him getting perverty around me”, or some such phrase. I’m pretty sure he used that distinctive irregular adjective, “perverty”. Anyway, he didn’t want it and wouldn’t put up with it.

      But that is one character in a work of fiction. In real life, Sarah, there are a great many 15-year-old boys, especially gay ones, who would love nothing more than a hunky grown-up guy making a pass at them and, indeed, going all the way. Don’t let your own “yuck” factor get in the way of understanding that not everyone is the same.

      Reply

  23. Theo
    Jul 20, 2015 @ 06:40:20

    Hi tom
    I totally agree UR book is great reading

    Reply

  24. Ronnie
    Jul 09, 2015 @ 12:50:45

    If a law is unjust, a man is not only right to disobey it, he is obligated to do so.

    —Thomas Jefferson.

    How often do we hear such unorthodox remarks today? Although, to be fair, the US Supreme Court okayed marriage equality at long last only days ago. Thomas Jefferson’s message was made at a time when the age of consent in young America was between ten and twelve years. We know only too well how age of consent in later centuries escalated. Moral codes became penal codes. And the letter of the law forged and pounded even the language of the law until it came out as sharp as a Samurai sword.
    There is now no more “statutory rape.” It is now “child rape.” The 1995 American repeal gives the statue a crueler cutting edge, don’t you think? I’m sure the legislative branch highfived the judicial branch on that one. It empowers prosecutors to wax poetic. Defense attorneys to cut deals out of proportion to fairer jurisprudence. And judges to verbally eviscerate the convicted trembling before him after passing sentence. God help the defendant who shows no remorse.
    Would I show remorse in that very situation? Would Thomas Jefferson?

    Reply

    • tomocarroll
      Jul 09, 2015 @ 13:02:21

      >Would I show remorse in that very situation? Would Thomas Jefferson?

      Good point Ronnie. And under today’s laws and law enforcement Jefferson, who was in a sexual relationship with a minor (Sally Hemings) from when she was around 14, would indeed have found himself in this very situation!

      Reply

    • Paula Black
      Dec 30, 2015 @ 22:47:14

      Bullshit! You do realize that you’re damaging that little girl’s insides. That’s what happened to me. I was molested when I was younger and I am 30 years old now and I still have severe health problems. Or do you not care?!? My God, you’re a full grown man with full grown equipment, you actually think that little girl is enjoying her self. Hell, it hurts when a WOMAN loses her virginity. It’s unfathomable pain when your a child, I would know. But, go ahead, since you enjoy it so much! It’s called CONTROL! I want to murder, so should I, but I want to so badly?!? NO, BECAUSE IT ISN’T RIGHT! It’s against the law and when you end up in General Population, then I guess it will be your turn for unfathomable pain. Good luck with that!

      Reply

  25. Ronnie
    Jul 06, 2015 @ 23:52:30

    Hello Tom and everybody. It is so nice to see a site encouraging love that transcends the normal boundaries. Love goes where it will: man, woman and child. I am currently reading “Paedophilia: the Radical Case.” Alongside other works and people such as the work of Alfred Kinsey and Rene Guyon’s “Ethics of Sexual Acts,” these works restore me to the natural high in direct opposition to the heartache of reading about people caught in the machinery of the law. And believe me: a lot of people, a lot of heartache. Your work, Tom, is a valuable antidote.

    By the way, American here.

    Reply

    • tomocarroll
      Jul 07, 2015 @ 08:03:04

      Good to hear from you, Ronnie. I am honoured to be mentioned along with Kinsey and Guyon.

      Reply

  26. PM
    Jul 02, 2015 @ 01:26:49

    Hello Tom, I love your blog, it is one of the few unique things I’ve seen around here, in this politically correct world, spreading our message via 100% legal. Any politician who seeks to discredit this site is just an opportunist who does not have even half of guts you have.

    I am a Girllover and my life has been hell for many years, but thank God who gave me this opportunity to make a better place for us childlovers in this crap of this misopedic world, in my country, these idiots have increased the age of consent of 13 to 15 years (previously 12), I would have sufficed with 12 but now I can not be with the girl I love … I hate anti-pedophiles with all my heart, if they attack and despise we have to defend ourselves either way.

    I would like to convey an issue, there is a group called Church of Creativity, who say their race is his religion, I despise racism, but it is an interesting idea, I wondered whether pedophiles can create a religion (as crazy as it seems ) based on our sexuality and love for children, religion is a more powerful weapon than politics, I know it’s strange but is it not strange to our tastes too? See much more realistic to believe that sex with children is divine, that the Emperor Xenu bombing Earth 7000 years ago. But this would not come into direct conflict with other beliefs (God, Jehovah, Science, Buddha etc.), I think that a divine power gave me this taste to appreciate the girls, those are my feelings, maybe it’s just another silly believer , you think of all this?

    PS: I’ll read your book with great interest. Sorry if my English is not perfect.

    Reply

    • tomocarroll
      Jul 02, 2015 @ 22:41:07

      Thanks for your appreciation, PM. Much appreciated!

      >I wondered whether pedophiles can create a religion (as crazy as it seems ) based on our sexuality and love for children

      Interesting idea. Rationalists like me might have a few problems with it, but I can see that it would appeal to many.

      Did you ever hear about the Children of God, later known as The Family? See https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Family_International

      This appears to have been a fundamentalist Christian cult founded and led by a charismatic figure, David Berg, who espoused a radically pro-sexual philosophy that included acceptance of adult-child sexual relations. So it wasn’t necessarily “pedophiles” creating a religion so much as one guy tolerant of paedophilia who adapted a religion. The child-love aspect seems to have been dropped after Berg’s death though.

      Reply

      • PM
        Jul 03, 2015 @ 23:10:02

        Really only he knew of them who had practiced adult-child relationships (like almost all sects are criticized for it), the end is to be cowed by fear of criticism and legal actions, so they said they were only four filthy “pedophile” priests and matter resolved … typical of Christians. I do not think something like “The Family” lasts more than two days, the proof is in the Davidians, plus there are cults of horrific child molesters, I do not want my religion to become something of that sort. Actually I would like to create something kind Scientology (I have something in common with them is that I reject psychiatry), at least figuratively, I have no millions of dollars and Tom Cruise! but in the sense of less based on religious beliefs (just a few) and more on self-help, mental and spiritual well-being, as Dianetics, but in pedosexual sense, for example, seems more feasible?

        I’m trying to write a book but I can not write more than two pages, so I can not express my philosophy and that frustrates me, I wish I could write like you and I would have a canon of books, or you can make a religion without a sacred book?

        Excuse me for asking so much, it is that I do not know who else I can ask these things.

        Reply

        • tomocarroll
          Jul 04, 2015 @ 09:36:15

          >…there are cults of horrific child molesters, I do not want my religion to become something of that sort.

          Indeed not, but I would just point out that stories of “Satanic abuse” in recent years have invariably turned out to be untrue. Religious rituals sometimes do have a basis I would consider abusive, though, such as male circumcision. This genital mutilation is a form of sexual abuse.

          >Actually I would like to create something kind Scientology

          Scientology has some of the elements of a religion and probably meets the usual criteria for a cult, in this case built around the charismatic figure of L. Ron Hubbard. New religions do seem to depend on its members rallying around a single individual. This has the advantage of getting a community going but there is also the great danger that the leader will go crazy (or be crazy to start with) but loyalty will demand continued commitment from the followers.

          The core problem is that the whole enterprise is irrational. The advantage of community solidarity (which seems to be the only advantage, although it is a big one) is outweighed by the absence of any well grounded factual basis for the doctrines. As a result, it will often be wrong about many important things, causing followers to misdirect their lives.

          >I’m trying to write a book but I can not write more than two pages, so I can not express my philosophy and that frustrates me, I wish I could write like you and I would have a canon of books, or you can make a religion without a sacred book?

          Followers of Judaism, Christianity and Islam have been called “people of the book”. They are all to some extent Bible based, and of course Islam has its own central book, the Qur’an. Earlier religions arose before books existed, so religions without books are certainly possible.

          My guess, though, is that in today’s crowded religion market, having a book is a huge advantage in getting started: a TV station or a big internet operation might be just as good, but those would need a major investment!

          Reply

          • PM
            Jul 04, 2015 @ 19:21:38

            Actually I meant Davidians, Synanon type cults, etc. With child abuse, whether sexual or not, I meant that there are evil people, not really “paedophiles”, which binds to kill, steal, rape … and these people really does not believe in anything.

            As you tell me in “Satanic Abuse” Obviously I do not think that story of pedofobic hysteria of satanic chanting “Hail Satan” and raping a girl (as I read in a previous post). Here in my country to my knowledge there has never been this panic, only satanic here are reputed to be murderers of animals and the like, I am also young all that I did not know existed until recently this panic.

            I would also like to know why not use our pedophiles symbols (BLogo, Clogo) are illegal or something in UK as the swastika? I’ve also seen an alleged pedophile flag on Wikipedia, I think that a symbol is important (LGBT flag, par excellence), though perhaps typical of young like me… although I suppose that your blog is more intellectual to put these things, I think.

            Reply

            • tomocarroll
              Jul 04, 2015 @ 20:21:30

              >I would also like to know why not use our pedophiles symbols (BLogo, Clogo) are illegal or something in UK…

              No, these symbols are not illegal and I am not against them. I think H-TOC would need a complete design makeover in order to give a place to such a symbol though, and that is not something I am contemplating at the moment.

              Reply

  27. M
    Jul 01, 2015 @ 06:09:26

    I am so very lonely and sad. Suicide has been on my mind. I just want to be able to share and express my love for a little girl without fear of being murdered physically and/or socially. Thank you for existing Mr. O’Carroll. Maybe with more people as bold and outspoken as you are, we can finally start feeling safe and accepted in this world. I only hope I will live to see it happen.

    Reply

    • tomocarroll
      Jul 01, 2015 @ 15:36:37

      Stick around here, M, and keep joining in the conversation – and on Girl Chat, or anywhere you can find sympathetic company. A problem shared is a problem halved, as they say, and it really does work. Worked for me anyway. I was suicidal once, as I wrote in Chapter 1 of my book Paedophilia: the Radical Case ( https://www.ipce.info/host/radicase/ ). I was young, then, and my heart goes out to minor-attracted young people today, who have an even tougher time than I did.

      But life can get more tolerable, believe me. I feel far more relaxed and at ease with myself now, despite all the hostility. The same could happen to you. Just keep talking, keep thinking, keep in your heart the knowledge that your loving feelings are worthy of expression, whatever uncomprehending people may say — and be mindful that there are those of us do understand.

      Tom will do, by the way. No formalities here, but thanks for the respect.

      It wasn’t my choice to exist, actually, since you put it that way; so no need to thank me for that. It was my choice to *continue* to exist, though. You have a similar choice, and choosing to stay the course could well have the same positive effect on others as you attribute to my existence.

      That’s a longer-term realisation, though. For the moment, we (I think I can speak collectively on this one) who would like to know if there is anyone you are talking to now, and who — probably quite a lot of people — you feel you cannot talk to.

      So, hang on in there, and let’s be hearing more from you.

      All best,

      Tom!

      Reply

    • Jasmine
      Jul 02, 2015 @ 04:19:29

      *hug*

      Hang in there. The whole H-TOC community is here to support you.

      It’s also possible to speak to a psychiatrist about depression without disclosing why you’re depressed. Anti-depressants tend to be roughly equally effective regardless of whether depression is intrinsically or extrinsically caused. Couch therapy might be a bit more difficult, though.

      Good luck! I hope we’ll soon live in a world where you can express your love to your heart’s content 🙂

      Reply

  28. lordplatania
    May 30, 2015 @ 15:26:44

    I’m a big fan, I support your cause

    Reply

  29. WalkingInThePark
    May 09, 2015 @ 15:13:26

    As a girl lover myself, from the age of around 10 onwards I’ve gone through life with a growing feeling of being different, alone, a freak unworthy of love. The press encourages this view ensuring that people with our sexuality are constantly reminded of just how hated we are. It doesn’t matter what good we do with our lives, how many people we might help, how much we contribute to society, if we’re attracted to children then we are without any worth.

    This is the view I had of myself throughout my life until around 5 years ago when I discovered a support community which didn’t judge me but allowed me to start to feel that I might not be what the press paints me to be. Gradually I was able to shake off those heavy beasts, self-doubt and self-hate and start to feel like a person with some worth once more. How I wish I had found your book much earlier in my life.

    Since then I’ve got to know many others with my same sexuality and it breaks my heart to see so many suffer as I did. Many are barely out of childhood themselves as they talk about their depression, plans for suicide, self-hate without any hope for the future. It makes me angry that in the 21st century we still allow this kind of inquisition to continue, destroying lives and reducing people to nothing more than animals because of something as basic as sexuality.

    Even showing sympathy for people of this sexuality is taboo. No laws broken, people just seeking basic human respect and decency but receiving none. How can we consider ourselves a civilised people while treating people this way?

    For other groups pushed to the edge of suicide and beyond there are often public support groups that don’t judge but offer support and encouragement. Throughout my life I never saw a poster in a doctor’s surgery that reached out to me or offered me a glimmer of hope. Are we really so unworthy that we’re pushed to the edge of society and left there to die? I don’t want to be reprogrammed, I don’t want to be told again how my sexuality makes me bad and should be corrected. Being different to another person’s vision of what’s right or normal does not make me bad.

    Great blog, it gives me hope that society isn’t beyond reach or repair.

    Reply

    • tomocarroll
      May 09, 2015 @ 17:23:24

      Thanks so much for these reflections, which are very personal but also reach far beyond your own individual experience: they touch us all, and I do hope others will read what you have said and take it to heart. Very best wishes!

      Reply

      • WalkingInThePark
        May 10, 2015 @ 17:13:35

        I have a follow on question. It was pointed out to be recently that the number of people including young adults talking about suicide within our support community is on the increase again. I don’t know if it’s seasonal or some of factor.

        This made me question why is there no obvious support available for people of our sexuality who find themselves in such dark places? I can walk into the doctors surgery or police station and find the walls covered in flyers for advice lines and charities offering support and shoulder to cry on for that health condition, or this sexuality or that minority. Many people with our sexuality are afraid to seek help or just don’t know where to go. They don’t want to be “corrected or re-educated”, they don’t want to be have their fears compounded, they just want support and to feel that there’s a place they can go and be treated with respect like normal human beings.

        So can you provide advice or ideas where people could seek support of this type, safely, without being judged?

        If such a place doesn’t exist, what would be the legal challenges to a charity forming to provide this kind of support service? I’m thinking along the lines of an online charity, perhaps with walk in centers where child lovers can go, talk about how they’re feeling perhaps to other child lovers providing support. As a legal charity it could advertise in surgeries, police stations, the press and other places where people might see and feel they need that support. My suspicion that while being legal, saving lives and providing social good it would be blocked in some way. What are your views on whether such a service if it doesn’t already exist, being allowed to exist?

        Reply

        • tomocarroll
          May 10, 2015 @ 21:27:21

          >…the number of people including young adults talking about suicide within our support community is on the increase again.

          It would surprise me if this were not the case in present circumstances, though I don’t know of any particular statistics.

          You ask whether minor attracted people can get support without being judged.

          The hard truth is that, no, they cannot, but it isn’t for the want of trying. Many years ago in Britain those of us in the Paedophile Information Exchange (PIE) provided such a service for a number of years. Comparable organisations in other countries, such as NAMBLA, made a similar contribution. As a result, both PIE and NAMBLA ran into legal difficulties. I strongly suspect that any “non-judgmental” group trying to help out now would hit the buffers in just the same way.

          The only alternative appears to be working with mental health professionals. This is being tried in the US by B4UACT and in the UK by a small group launched in an announcement on Heretic TOC a couple of years ago. See MAP-ing the terrain of better therapy: https://tomocarroll.wordpress.com/2013/08/31/map-ing-the-terrain-of-better-therapy/

          The group in question, Forum for Understanding Minor Attraction (FUMA), has been engaged in discussions with mental health people but progress is painfully slow. The problem, it seems, is the “non-judgmental” bit. If you are interested in helping, I am sure they would be very pleased to hear from you. FUMA are here: fuma100.wordpress.com

          Reply

    • Tash
      Feb 17, 2016 @ 04:44:54

      So why do u think that is??? People can accept love in any form eventually. But what you’re doing isn’t love. The other person too often gets hurt. It doesn’t matter what you think. There are people who don’t want you dead and want to understand you and help you. But they can’t accept what you do. It’s not all about you. It’s about the little people you hurt.

      Reply

  30. tomocarroll
    Sep 14, 2014 @ 20:29:44

    @James.

    >Are you suggesting everyone should pass these exams or just children? What effect would this have on the cognitively disabled?

    I wondered if you’d ask me this!

    In the UK, “lunatics” and “idiots” were traditionally not allowed to vote, and this was not formally changed until the 2006 Electoral Administration Act gave psychiatric in-patients the right to register for a vote.

    While I would not wish for the return of the offensive terms used above, it is not clear to me why anyone with a permanent condition of serious cognitive impairment should be considered any more competent to vote than infants. The stigmatising effect of excluding them, however, to my mind outweighs this consideration, especially in view of the fact that their numbers are not great and under the present system they are unlikely to influence an election decisively.

    This gives rise to further questions, though: instead of giving people a pointless, ineffectual vote, why not reform the electoral system? Arguably, the treatment of severely psychotic and cognitively impaired patients would be greatly improved if politicians had to fight for their votes. This would happen if these patients were to be grouped into one or more constituencies comprised *entirely* of such patients. The danger then, I guess, is that the politicians might make false, impractical, promises which exploit the patients’ inability to evaluate them. But to a great extent they do that with entire conventional electorates!

    As for my exam proposal, it addresses the issue of competence but unfortunately it does not touch upon how children’s interests would get serious attention in the event of them getting a vote. Clearly, not that many would pass the test I outlined, and those would mainly be into their teens. At present, parents are assumed to want what is best for their kids and to vote accordingly for parties that they feel are best on providing education, health care, etc, for their offspring. In many ways they do a good job in this regard, but in some ways maybe not e.g. they are not much inclined to vote for any politician supporting sexual rights for kids! Nevertheless, kids’ interests do not go entirely unrepresented at present.

    However, if *all* adults were made to take a test of voting competence, what would happen if they failed the test? Who then would represent their interests? Their parents might be no longer alive, and they might fail the test themselves anyway.

    Reply

    • James
      Sep 15, 2014 @ 03:31:09

      “Of course I’ll vote for your interests!” Said the husband to the Suffragette.

      The point of suffrage is not to pick the best leaders – with regard to its selection effect, democracy’s strong point is screening out the exceptionally insane or idiotic. In practice, anything else goes, regardless of how closely-held the right to vote is.The point of suffrage is to ensure that leaders act with the interests of their constituents in mind. Futarchy improves on Representative Democracy with regard to the optimisation of citizens’ values, but it is important to remember that value optimisation is at the heart of all democratic systems.

      With a sufficiently sound electoral process and a sufficiently broad base, the median voter theorem will ensure that the addition of a large electoral minority (in this case children) will not cause the selection of worse leaders. However, it will ensure their interests are accounted for in a manner that the votes of their parents never could. Given what I know of the math of democracy, I am secure in the belief that increasing suffrage, even without gate-keeping tests, will not erode the quality of leadership to any perceptible degree. However, I would find it truly unconscionable to deny anyone the right to ensure that the state under whose jurisdiction they fall must act in the service of their interests and values. Values not presented by the actions of their parents but by the purest expression of their own independent will – the vote.

      Reply

      • tomocarroll
        Sep 15, 2014 @ 09:38:10

        >”Of course I’ll vote for your interests!” Said the husband to the Suffragette.

        And no doubt husbands *did* largely vote in the interests of their wives before women got the vote, to the extent that as a family their economic fortunes stood or fell together. Likewise, parents do generally have their kids’ interests at heart.

        The problem in both cases is when there are divergences of interest, and it is because these divergences exist that I have always supported children’s rights, backed by the force of law. See my piece “Why children really do need rights” in An open letter to Frank Furedi on Heretic TOC just a few months ago:
        https://tomocarroll.wordpress.com/2014/04/12/an-open-letter-to-frank-furedi/

        Whether the right to vote at age 5, say, or 10, should be among these rights is another matter.

        >The point of suffrage is not to pick the best leaders – with regard to its selection effect, democracy’s strong point is screening *out* the exceptionally insane or idiotic.

        But it often fails even in this regard, as with the example I gave about the Germans voting for Hitler. Another case would be the Israeli system which has ended up in the past with an extreme religious party holding the balance of power and thereby being an extremist tail wagging the dog of the body politic. Not sure how things stand now, as even the mainstream there looks increasingly extreme to the world at large.

        Most people, by definition, cannot be at the numerically small extreme ends of any normally distributed spectrum of opinion. Looked at in this statistical way your point logically has to be correct. But what if, as with the German case (and the Israeli one?), a majority hold opinions that in other times and places would be considered extreme?

        Sorry, time presses, but will try to return later to your remaining (very interesting) points.

        For now, I’ll just close with a request. How about a guest blog from you, James? I’m sure it would be great.

        Reply

        • James
          Sep 16, 2014 @ 00:48:50

          The problem with acting on another’s behalf (also known as “other optimisation”) is not so much conflicting interests as a matter of no-one knowing you as well as you know you. The advantage of the free market over central-planning is not that the market is a benevolent God (heavens no!) but that people in a market are acting for their own interests which they know better than any central-planner ever could. There’s also a whole host of biases at work when we try to help others that don’t exist when we help ourselves. The mere existence of inefficient charity is a testament to this fact.

          Democracy,s selling-point isn’t “I am the Platonic ideal”, it’s “I’m better than monarchy”. This is true. The extremism issue is handled in the USA by a well-designed constitution while a Futarchy would handle it by formalizing its values carefully enough that a contradiction (where the electorate wants something harmful to it) would be quickly noticed.

          Thanks for asking but I’ve no idea what I’d write about. I’d probably just bore/confuse your readers 😛

          Reply

  31. Red Ryder
    Jul 09, 2014 @ 17:20:02

    Hi Tom,

    I read ‘The Moralist’ after reading your review on it & I found it so inspiring that I re read it immediately. Could you recommend any similar works to this that I should look up? I’d appreciate any recommendations, thanks. I think you’re a legend btw. I also read your reply to that critic of the Rind et al study. My chest puffed with pride that someone could savage those bigots with such ease. I salute you.

    Reply

    • tomocarroll
      Jul 09, 2014 @ 18:32:39

      Hi, Red Ryder. I’m not sure there’s anything I would consider similar to The Moralist, but there’s an interesting pro-BL take to be found in Edmund Marlowe’s Alexander’s Choice. I find myself so overwhelmed with non-fiction “must read” books, research papers, etc. these days that I have little time for fiction, sadly. Perhaps other readers would care to make suggestions. As for my reply to “that critic of the Rind et al. study”, I wonder which critic you mean. There are so many!

      Reply

  32. JohnW
    Jul 06, 2014 @ 06:52:29

    Reply

  33. Peter
    Jun 29, 2014 @ 18:36:52

    I read part of your book, pedophilia: A Radical Case, before I threw it away out of fear some one would find it. What you write is completely in line with my own life experiences regarding the emotional and sexual feelings of children, based on my memory as being a child myself and in my relating to children while being an adult who loves all children especially boys.

    My love for boys is, just like yours, intertwined with a deep pain:

    – the pain caused by the loss of my own youth, the loss of some deep friendships I had with boys, whom I lost and who lost me, against their will, because of the fear and over-controlling behavior of their parents

    and

    – the pain caused by the realization that I will most probably never be able to completely, with all my soul, experience love with a boy

    It is hard for me, as it probably is for you to understand the meaning of our strange fate. The fate to feel such a strong love towards children which feels so pure and good to us but which hetero and homosexual people and society in general sees as pure evilness. It is such a contradiction, this is hard to swallow for me.

    If i think about it i immediately start crying. Like always the tears are there, waiting to flow. When i think of my own youth, the boys I have loved, the boys I love now… I always cry. Such a big hole that longs to be filled, which will probably remain empty until my last breath, with no one capable to explain what is wrong with me.

    Thank you for letting me write these words about my deepest self and I thank you deeply for making available your message of your own life. Thank you for very good book ‘the case’. To show my appreciation I will buy your book of Michael Jackson which I am sure will be very clarifying. Also his life is very recognizable for me. What a pain this man must have gone through…

    Best regards and all the best for your further life and love!

    Peter

    Reply

    • tomocarroll
      Jun 29, 2014 @ 22:09:23

      In my case, Peter, in the words of the Beatles, I’ve “got by with a little help from my friends”. I sincerely hope you do too. I have no idea how old you are but I can tell you that for me things are better now than when I was young. It’s not that I have young lovers, I don’t. But the pain eases. Life can actually be good.

      Reply

      • Peter
        Jul 04, 2014 @ 20:54:52

        Hello Tom, I thought I already answered you but something might have gone wrong… I appreciate your kind reply, at once an older experienced man who has gone before me with the same burden and from who i can learn how to live with it in dignity 🙂

        Knowing I am not alone and that there is craftsmanship in pedophilia. With craftsmanship I mean learning how to become a healthy balanced kid-oriented human being who has the conviction to not put at risk children’s psychological well being in order to ease his / hers aching pain. It is a kind of martyr-ship which i am sure can bring a lot of joy. The love for the boys becomes more intense as sexuality is transcended and just caring and tutoring and cuddling becomes enough to fulfill ones life… that all remorse and frustration drops in this friendly and noble enjoyment.

        You are helping me to achieve that honorable and pure loving way of life

        Thanks again!

        Greets

        Peter

        Reply

    • Elisa
      Jul 03, 2014 @ 22:16:03

      Dear Peter,
      I was moved by your post and pondered upon it. You are not alone, and your words do not go unnoticed – today for instance you were on my mind all afternoon 🙂
      And whenever you do feel alone, summon your inner strength and rely on the certainty that however “strange” your fate may appear to you now, you are fully entitled to a place in the sun. You don’t need someone to explain to you what is wrong with you – quite the opposite: you need someone to show you how nothing is wrong with you.
      Do not hide, do not pretend to be something different from what you are. Set an example in dignity for those around you to see. It’ll be appreciated by those who care for you and “with a little help from friends”, you’ll cope. And Tom is right when saying that time eases pain and yes, life can be good. And you have this moral imperative of making it good for yourself.

      I’ll leave you with Prof. Morton N. Cohen’s words on Lewis Carroll:

      “His genius with words, his creative nonsense, his hilarious dramatis personae, his amusing episodes, his tickling absurdities, his way of appealing to ear, eye, head, and heart – they are all elements of his magic. Perhaps he himself needed to flee the harsh realities of his solitude, but he equally needed to share all his gifts with others. If his creative work helped him alleviate his own frustration, it also brought sacks full of amusement and entertainment to friends and strangers alike.
      The forces that shaped Charles’s [Lewis Carroll] sexual orientation are still mysterious. If we read the hillock of psychoanalytical tomes that have tried to get at the essence of this man’s psyche, we come away with numbing contradictions. Charles never saw any of the works of Freud or other early writers on psychoanalysis, he could not have read any medical or psychological works that might suggest that his feelings had a legitimate place in the world. It cannot have been easy for him growing up […] to confront inner promptings that he recognised as different, extrasocietal, awkward, embarrassing, punitive, completely as odds with what he observed in other boys and men, opposed to what he had been taught to believe to be right in the eyes of those he loved and in the dicta of his faith. Living with that inner self must have caused sleepless hours; it must have required him to fashion a very special external persona; it must have brought him untold anguish. But carefully, gradually, deliberately, he found a way through his immense difficulty, he learned how to deal with his feelings as a man.
      In the end, one wants not only to say “Well done!” but also to congratulate him for so successfully transforming a life that might easily have teetered on the brink and fallen into the abyss into one that was useful, dignified, and creative. For he, and he alone, shaped that precarious youth of unusual talent and scrupulous character into a man who made many valuable and distinguished contributions to his world and to posterity – who made himself, in short, into a man worth writing about.”

      Reply

      • tomocarroll
        Jul 03, 2014 @ 22:30:26

        I’d just like to endorse your excellent comment, Elisa, and your very apt choice of Morton Cohen’s highly perceptive remarks.

        Reply

      • Peter
        Jul 04, 2014 @ 20:44:18

        Thank you Elisa, I really appreciate it 🙂
        This: ‘Do not hide, do not pretend to be something different from what you are.’ fits my character most. But I just can’t do it fully because I will lose the possibility to befriend boys. I do it partly and I am sure people with a keen eye can recognize what i feel for boys. But luckily most are quite blind so I can be quite natural without loosing them. 🙂

        Reply

  34. Nicola Bryan
    Mar 04, 2014 @ 12:37:05

    Hi Tom. I work for ITV and am keen to speak to you about an interview. Can you drop me an email – nicola.bryan@itv.com Thanks

    Reply

  35. Stuart Fanning
    Feb 26, 2014 @ 17:44:58

    Information held at Syracuse University which holds the Grove Press/BarneyRossett collection.

    http://library.syr.edu/digital/guides/g/grove_press.htm#b-bf-shuter

    Reply

  36. Stuart Fanning
    Feb 26, 2014 @ 17:14:01

    Reply

  37. Stuart Fanning
    Feb 26, 2014 @ 10:50:50

    Hello Mr O’Carroll. In 1976 Grove Press in New York published a book called ‘Green Fruit’ by a PIE member using the false name Yul H. Duersted, detailing his exploits with his daughter and other children, for which he was jailed. Can it be revealed now the real name of the man who wrote this book?

    https://picasaweb.google.com/118245811686959745462/GreenFruitByYulHDuerstedGrovePress1976

    Reply

    • tomocarroll
      Feb 26, 2014 @ 13:59:00

      I was told a few years ago that Duersted was the pen-name of a certain Dudley Shooter, who lived in Stratford, East London. Presumably, if he was jailed, his name would have been in the press at the time. That would have been around 40 or more years ago, though, so any press coverage would be difficult to locate. Google fails to connect the two names.

      Does anyone else know what became of this very talented writer?

      Reply

  38. Just A Guy
    Jan 29, 2014 @ 05:52:36

    I’d like to suggest a copyright notice/license to consider implementing for your blogs.

    “Permission to copy: This document is copyrighted. Copyright 2014 by Tom O’Carroll. All rights reserved. The author hereby grants permission to make and distribute copies and/or excerpts, subject to the following conditions: (a) you may not modify the text; (b) you must acknowledge the source, namely this web site, https://tomocarroll.wordpress.com, with the author’s name attached; (c) you must include this copyright and permission statement; and (d) you may not use the document or copies thereof for commercial gain, not even so much as to recover the cost of making paper copies. If you want to distribute paper copies, you must give them away for free, and cover the cost of the copy yourself.”

    This would allow verbatim copies to be posted elsewhere, while reserving all your rights and ensuring that attribution is made, including a link to your site.

    There would be several benefits to this. Other sites, which could then reproduce your blog entries, *must* include a link to your site – this will improve your Google rating.

    Readers will be encouraged to visit your site through the mandatory link.

    You may find that another site (for example BoyChat) could reproduce a verbatim post in its entirety, and you would then find that many more will respond with comments to your posts there, as they would not be limited by the need for javascript being enabled, or other software problems. You then may choose to include a link in your blog post to those comment threads, if you feel they are useful.

    What do you think?

    Just A Guy

    Reply

    • tomocarroll
      Jan 30, 2014 @ 00:52:01

      Many thanks. I’ll give this some thought, albeit not immediately as I am on tour right now.

      Reply

  39. Shibboleth
    Jan 28, 2014 @ 04:41:10

    Do paedophiles regard children as capable of self-determination when it comes to voting, joining the military, supporting themselves financially, entering contracts, etc.? If not, why is sex any different?

    Reply

    • tomocarroll
      Jan 28, 2014 @ 10:17:04

      I feel I should give a personal answer to these questions as opinions differ and Heretic TOC is my legal responsibility. My short answer to your first question is no, I personally do not regard children as capable of entering into contracts with onerous or long-term implications e.g. marriage, or joining the military. As for the second, sex is different insofar as, and to the extent that, it does NOT have serious consequences that demand mature consideration and judgment. Sex between prepubescent children, for instance, does NOT involve the danger of unwanted pregnancy or indeed any pregnancy. For a full answer, I recommend “Consent and willingness”, which is Chapter 8 of my book Paedophilia: The Radical Case: https://tomocarroll.wordpress.com/wp-admin/edit-comments.php?p=2&approved=1
      The whole book is available as a free download.

      Reply

      • James
        Sep 10, 2014 @ 20:52:03

        “contracts with onerous or long-term implications”

        That covers the military and contracts. What about voting and working?

        Reply

        • tomocarroll
          Sep 11, 2014 @ 12:59:18

          First of all, I was addressing a particular question: “Do paedophiles regard children as capable of self-determination [my emphasis] when it comes to voting, joining the military, supporting themselves financially, entering contracts, etc.?” The question of children deciding things for themselves is usually asked in connection with the impact of the decisions on the child him- or her-self i.e. Will the child benefit or be harmed by allowing them self-determination? Even if a 14-year-old, say, knows exactly what he is doing in signing up for military service (i.e. he knows he could get killed and will not be allowed to quit whenever he likes), we may feel his intellectual capacity to make an informed decision should be outweighed by an obligation to protect him on account of his presumed emotional immaturity and volatility.

          Voting, though, is different. Voting the “wrong” way might lead to the election of a bellicose government committed to starting a war in which the voters (including young civilians) get bombed, but we do not deny children the vote in order to protect them personally from the consequences of unwise decisions. We might, though, want to protect society from the collective ignorance and folly of young voters (not that their elders are necessarily smarter: the German people voted for Hitler and look what happened to them!). So the biggest issue here is not so much self-determination as societal-determination: society (many would say) seeks protection from the young where voting is concerned, not for them. Incidentally, Nelson Mandela unsuccessfully urged the ANC to reduce the voting age to 14 in South Africa. In a few days’ time 16-year-olds will be able to vote in the referendum on the independence of Scotland.

          As for self-determination to work, many would think the nature of the work, and any terms and conditions of employment, can be more important than age: even adults, after all, are protected by law in the developed countries from hazardous work with unguarded machinery, toxic materials, etc, and unhealthily long hours of labour. I would not like to see us go back to the days when, in Victorian England, small boys would often meet an early death through choking, lung disease, etc, as a result of climbing up sooty chimneys to clean them. In extremis, they may have welcomed the money, but even so…

          Also, full-time work will in most cases conflict with the right to an education. On the other hand, in countries where free education is not provided, getting an income may serve a child’s long-term interests better than enforced idleness. And, of course, many forms of part-time work can be highly educative.

          Which brings me to a few questions of my own. You mentioned that you have an “internship”. Might I ask what sort? For how long? Do you feel it is the most suitable thing to be doing at the moment? Do you expect to go to university? If not, why not? How do you see your future developing in the next 10 years or so, especially in educational and career terms?

          Reply

          • James
            Sep 13, 2014 @ 03:06:48

            You explained why voting is not self-determination but not whether you supported its extension.

            I was previously employed with a laboratory. My internship expired when my first semester at (what is roughly the equivalent of) an A Level college began. That’s where I am now. 10 years from now I expect to be finishing up a doctoral thesis. I’ll probably be fully-transitioned and living in a developed country – preferably on the European Continent.

            Reply

            • tomocarroll
              Sep 13, 2014 @ 19:03:58

              Good to know you have some clear expectations, especially as it looks as though they match your aims.

              >You explained why voting is not self-determination but not whether you supported its extension.

              I would be happy to see voting permitted at any age, but only after passing a fairly tough exam in civics (local & national government structure/functions, historical/ideological background to the main political parties and their key policies) and economics (basic stuff on supply & demand, markets, private & public sector; plus “macro” stuff re government: taxation, control of money supply, levels of employment, rates of interest, etc.). Come to think of it, couples should be required to pass parenting tests before being allowed to breed, except for the fact that the state would ask the wrong questions and make the wrong demands!

              Reply

              • James
                Sep 14, 2014 @ 18:36:55

                Are you suggesting everyone should pass these exams or just children? What effect would this have on the cognitively disabled?

                I’d definitely agree with making potential parents take a crash-course in parenting.

                Reply

  40. Phil
    Dec 31, 2013 @ 19:25:12

    ‘Paedophilophobia’ – what an outstanding use of vocabulary (or ‘creation’ of).. The very fact the word does not seem to exist out there speaks volumes for the overt or unconscious suppression of tolerant debate on the topic. I too have only various half-formed intuitions about it all, and every time a newspaper article pops up on some abuse case (which is at least ‘weekly’) it tends to crystallize one of them for a moment, the insanity of the legal shenanigans crying out to me. I wish I could tie these moments of clarity together. Tom does this extremely well. Welcome King Log, your thoughts are very lucid – ‘Do witch-hunts and moral panics represent last desperate struggles of a dominant idea whose credibility is coming to an end?’ – that’s particularly good. And I nearly spat out my minced pie at your anecdote (which could be given the status of a ‘parable of our times’) about the paedophile-hating mother buying a padded bra for her 8-year-old. It would take some skill to *invent* such an insane character in fiction.

    Reply

  41. king log
    Dec 30, 2013 @ 07:11:39

    In my youth, when at university, I plucked up the courage to take your book “paedophilia: the radical case” out of the library. I read it over and over – it really changed my life, and helped keep me sane. I’m sure that you’ve helped and enriched the lives of many people who were, like me, afraid and confused.

    Your blog is an island of sanity in this sea of hate and misunderstanding!

    Would you, or any of your guest contributors, be able to throw any light on why our contemporary western society so hates paedophilia? I’d love to read some good comparative and historical perspectives on this. Or a kind of Barthesian deconstruction of what ‘Paedophilia’ means to your man on the street. What social changes happened in the 70s that made all this hysteria kick off?

    I have my own ideas, but these are half-formed intuitions. It seems important that we should understand the causes and nature of this ‘paedophilophobia’ – understanding it is an important step to combating it.

    Reply

    • tomocarroll
      Dec 30, 2013 @ 10:56:49

      Thanks hugely for your appreciation, KL! Our “island of sanity” is small but beautiful, so welcome to our shores!

      >What social changes happened in the 70s that made all this hysteria kick off?

      Ah, so many factors, so much to ponder! Some blame the 1960s but the 1760s are not necessarily so innocent either: at this time, arguably, the modern concept of childhood sexual innocence was born, a theme that plays strongly today in an age when we are now being infantilised (thanks largely to technology and demographics) into our twenties and even thirties!

      >I have my own ideas, but these are half-formed intuitions.

      Welcome to the club! None of us can be sure. We can only speculate and debate, grabbing whatever information is to hand, of which there is plenty in the internet age – formal academic studies, informal observations of popular culture, etc. There is one study, limited in scope to pederasty, but very deep and wide-ranging, which I hope to be examining quite soon – Bruce Rind’s “Pederasty: An integration of empirical, historical, sociological, cross-cultural, cross-species, and evolutionary perspectives” – which addresses the sort of societies in which pederasty has hitherto been culturally accepted and why. However, I would be very pleased to consider any thoughts you may have for a guest blog of your own.

      Reply

      • king log
        Dec 31, 2013 @ 18:08:21

        Thanks, Tom, for suggesting that I might contribute to this site. I’d love to think I’d be up to it but I fear that anything I would contribute would probably not be up to the scholarly standards that I so appreciate here.

        But I’ll mention one aspect of the current hysteria that I find particularly striking: how certain aspects of popular culture seem to be co-opting adolescent and child sexual identity as a way of creating a certain mindset in the young (to describe this mindset as ‘consumerist’ might be simplistic but I think it’s something not far off), whilst at the same time contributing to the whipping up hysteria against paedophilia.

        A few years ago I worked in a factory and used to listen to the mothers who worked there. I remember a mother telling us about the padded bra and ‘slut’ t-shirt she’d bought her 8 year old daughter, and then later talking about what forms of torture she’d use on paedophiles if she could get her hands on one! Needless to say I kept my opinions to myself.

        I was, at first, struck by the apparent dis-juncture in her attitudes. But on further consideration I saw how they could be consistent with each other: her purchases seemed to show that she was aware that her daughter was not as innocent and asexual as the dominant narrative would assert she should be, and that she accepted it, to a certain extent.

        Her hatred of paedophiles came from the consequent awareness that the ‘paedophile’, vis a vis her daughter, was in fact ‘knocking at an open door’ – a door that she may have felt she hadn’t done enough to keep ‘shut’.

        It’s striking that the Victorians (or at least middle-class victorians) – who seemed more convinced than us about childhood asexuality and innocence (they hadn’t read Freud, or course…) seemed to be less fearful about paedophilia (or whatever it was known as at the time). Although, of course, there was the ‘Eliza Armstrong affair…

        So does the current hysteria come out of the despair and conflict of a society that wishes to hang on to the idea that children are asexual but, finding it harder and harder to convince itself, turns it’s hatred and fear towards those that most threaten this now-fragile conception of childhood (i.e. paedophiles AND children themselves)?

        Do witch-hunts and moral panics represent last desperate struggles of a dominant idea whose credibility is coming to an end?

        These are just some ideas and observations that I’ve been chewing over recently.

        But I’ll try to get a read of the Bruce Rind – it sounds ambitious and promises to cover so many aspects.

        I think that finding any answers would be a long-term project and quite a commitment. But I’m resolving to at least start noting down my thoughts, finding the right questions to ask and compiling a reading list.

        regards

        King Log

        Reply

        • tomocarroll
          Dec 31, 2013 @ 18:34:04

          a society that wishes to hang on to the idea that children are asexual but, finding it harder and harder to convince itself

          This is part of it, I think, but there really are a lot of significant interrelated factors.

          Reply

  42. Dave
    Nov 25, 2013 @ 22:10:33

    Is it possible to put me in contact with just *1* religiously circumcised paedophile living in the UK, who lives on the edge of sanity day in and day out because of a double-dose of life-shit that had him strapped to a board to have the most sensitive part of his most private part cut off in the name of bullshit on his entry into the world, only to be monsterised and cast-out for his sexuality? I am unable to find this person living a parallel life to me, yet I know he exists.

    Reply

  43. Wednesday
    Aug 13, 2013 @ 01:21:08

    I was just wondering, how young do you think a child can be and stil have some sort of “meaningful relationship” such as a sexual one? How did you come to your ideas?Wow! I never knew sites like these were out here.

    Reply

    • tomocarroll
      Aug 13, 2013 @ 09:58:51

      Your questions are answered in my book, Paedophilia: The Radical Case, available free online here: http://transres.freeweb7.com/radcase/radcase.html

      For now, I would invite you to consider this: Is it possible for a mother to have a “meaningful relationship” with her baby? Is it possible for her to be a good mother if she does not?

      Reply

  44. Phil
    Aug 10, 2013 @ 01:49:26

    I constantly ruminate over the desire to write a novel on these topics: the JF case cries out to be novelized (would have to give him and her-with-no-name different names, of course), but there’s so many scenarios or items of real-life news that could be drawn upon. I’m of precisely the same opinion that it would be an extremely effective way to reach the public consciousness, assuming it’s a fairly good novel of course. Who on earth would publish? Well, there’s e-publishing now at least, isn’t there? One idea I have which could possibly even be palatable to book publication is of a mid-teen boy getting into a affair with his female teacher. I’m hetero (95% anyway), so I’d have to write from my libido. In my novel he emerges the better for his experiences, and the pair give a big fuck-off to the establishment. Hope I’m not waffling or using out-of-place language. Just needed to share these thoughts! Really I should pull my finger out of the proverbial, and just get it done.

    Reply

  45. Jed Jones
    Dec 11, 2012 @ 11:38:39

    Hello Tom, I am sort of reporting back. In 2003 you advised me that a novel was potentially more effective than a thousand academic volumes as a means of getting a critique of the ‘raging inferno’ across to the masses. Now I’m writing one (with no idea yet of who in their right mind would publish it but I feel it needs to be written anyway). I also use humour; sometimes it’s a tad less gentle than yours. The discovery of your blog cheers me already:)

    http://www.writing.com/main/portfolio/view/jedjones

    Reply

    • Phil
      Aug 10, 2013 @ 16:53:57

      So much common sense spoken there, Jed [your ‘April’s Law Will Harm children’]. I think the magic phrase was this:
      “How much taxpayers’ money is going to be splurged on yet another hunt for scapegoats which destroys the lives of yet more children and families in the name of child protection, without actually protecting any child from anybody they need protecting from?”
      I just wouldn’t dare present that argument in polite company, though.

      Reply

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